Crazy Dog Lady

7-22-2005 - 11:03 a.m.

Chicago is dry. Sometimes it's hard to get too worked up about drought conditions when the world's largest source of fresh water is in sight constantly. But I'm from the east coast, and if we went this long without rain back east, anarchy wouldn't be too far off.

In other news, my dog is getting surgery today. It's his first time being alone at the vet. And I am freaked out. I have two alternating visions this morning. In one, there is some tragic complication during an otherwise routine surgery, and the vet is standing over Winston, with electric shock paddles, trying to bring my dog back from the dead. Machines sound alerts. Nurses scramble. Winston lies on the table lifelessly.

In the other vision, the surgery goes fine. Winston groggily awakes, and immediately begins going on a vengeful rampage, mauling any living creature in sight. Nurses are missing limbs, kittens are decapitated, and Winston runs out onto the sidewalk, headed in my direction to pay me back for this morning's betrayal.

Before - After